Hair pulling, for example, has always been a hot button for me. Because taking a fistful of hair between my fingers *feels* good. Because I can see him wince when I pull his head back. I can hear that sharp intake of air. I can control how much it hurts by picking where I make a fist, and how hard and how long I hold it.
Why I enjoy delivering pain
I am a strange sadist..in that I don’t often crave just flat-out inflicting pain. There usually must be some other ritual involved or some fascination with the method.
Hair pulling, for example, has always been a hot button for me. Because taking a fistful of hair between my fingers *feels* good. Because I can see him wince when I pull his head back. I can hear that sharp intake of air. I can control how much it hurts by picking where I make a fist, and how hard and how long I hold it.
And it requires no tools except for my hand.
The same goes with biting. Merely lowering my teeth down onto his tender flesh is enough to get me all worked up — watching his reaction as I bite down harder..and harder..until he has to gasp and ask for mercy.
It makes me think about the devices we use. Paddles. Canes. Floggers. Nipple Clamps. All devices to inflict pain — among other things.
How important is the instrument, though?
Is it because nipple clamps are attached to a vulnerable part of the male anatomy? What about clothespins on the balls?
Or is it just that it is *pain*?
For me, I think it is more about the pain, and the type of pain, than how sexy the instrument of pain is. That is — it does not really *have* to be clamped on the nipples, clothespins on the balls. It can be simpler, as long as it is effective.
If there was a device that — say, for example — just strapped onto your partner’s wrist, and you could control the level of pain they would feel — would you find that sexy? Is it the control and level of the pain, or is it the nature of the pain that gets you off?
If — another idea where — you could control the perceived pain through hypnosis — would that be as effective? You could tell them it was burning, like fire — or throbbing — or a limb being strained.
What is it about the *pain* itself? Is it the reaction to the pain — is it how the pain looks being inflicted?
For me, it is mostly *discomfort*. I like subtle, sexy discomfort most of all. Squirming. Sweat. Swallowing hard. Dealing with it. Breathing. All of this is associated with lower levels of pain that increase. Like a fist tightening in hair.
It’s always been more about the reaction to me. More about that than the act.
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